After I uploaded the last image she seems to have left me alone. I felt a great sense of relief. Her eyes must have been taken off of me. Until of course a couple weeks later while working on numerous other projects I started to experience some new phenomena.
Normally I am not very sensitive to scents, can't say I have a very strong sense of smell, however for the past month I have been catching glimpses of various smells that I can not explain. At first I thought it was just like any other passing scent anyone may catch here and now again but soon I was not so sure. I kept falling into moments of absolute certainty that I had put my face in front of something or had some objects sneak up behind me only to have it all disappear in an instant.
I felt the scent of: strawberries, roses, burnt wood and metal, wet fur, smoked air, cold winter light, tea leaves, gas, sulfur, ammonia, open seas, early autumn mornings, honey, bird nests, lightning, sunset hiding in the woods, eyes peeking through the dark, pine trees, newly mowed grass, cool human skin, closely built concrete walls, a room with no corners, impossible tunnels, half closed windows, static radio stations. Never have I felt the smell for more than just a second and then it was immediately gone. Not to mention, I only felt these while in my own home. Not even that, I felt them while sitting at my desk.
As I started noticing these aromatic hallucinations I also started catching myself work on some new piece from time to time that I never really thought about as I often would try and make myself do. Usually I spend time considering what I want to do with something in some capacity as it is absolutely imperative for my process to be this way and yet no matter how much that is the case with me it seems this one seems to wanted to come out one way or another. I didn't really care, as long as I was working it was all fine. But soon I started staying up late painting while listening to songs I never knew I saved in my library for long stretches of time until I was brought back to reality by someone else.
Whenever I would drift off I'd think of a field of flowers, a vertical field that seems to have forgot no flora acts this way as if it wants to do things its own way common sense be damned and no one single or multiple unit of life will ever have the gall to spread its long reason-tendrils which would be used to make all things right once more until it is all back to where it must be or always was depending on how you see yourself believing things or not believing I honestly can't tell as long as there is static coming through the growth I felt it was ok to be so warm from it all and feel the loss of vision blink in and out of existence with a single red eye piercing through it all and staring back at me with life I thought not possible before...
The piece is finished. I won't look at it again. I know that's a lie. You do too. Do you? I'll keep it up for you. It wants you to see. You want to see it too. I think. It came again. I didn't notice. How could I? I thought I'd know. This is for you. Offer tribute.
She knows you are watching.